weddings, soccer games, and teachers

Wow, it has been a long time...

A lot has happened in the past few weeks. I got to go home for Spring Break (last week) and celebrate my Best Friend's Wedding. Yup, you heard me right. Megan and Jake tied the knot! :) I couldn't be more happy for those two. It's still crazy to think that they are actually married. I don't know why but it just hasn't hit me yet. I remind myself but that doesn't help much. I am sure one of these days it will click. :) Still I am ever so happy for them!

Megan and Jake Probert

03/13/2010 :)

While I was home I got to see all of my family which was so wonderful. I miss them dreadfully! So it was good to spend a week with them. Tate had his first soccer game which I wasn't able to attend however I did get some pictures thanks to Jeremy!

I also spent some time with Katie (my roommate) who came down to spend some time in the sun. So it was a lot of fun that break! I know that a lot more happened but I have to go to class soon so those stories will have to wait for another day. :)

After I got home from the break, I had to hurry up and get caught up on my homework (which I didn't do over the week- not surprising). While I was doing my homework, I checked my email and I had one from the Department Head of Math and Stats informing me that my Complex Variable class for the next day was cancelled due to my teacher having to go into the hospital for an emergency. It said not to worry and to expect class on Wednesday to continue as scheduled. Well, that was okay cause that meant I had an extra day to finish that homework. I was still really worried but I was sure he was going to be okay. So, Monday morning I checked my email again just to make sure nothing had changed, and I had received yet again another email from the department head. This email, however, was not one I would have like to receive. It told me that my teacher had had a massive heart attack and had passed away early Monday morning. Dr. Russell Thompson was a good man and one of my favorite math teachers. He reminded me so much of a Grandpa because of his cheery disposition. I am so sad that he is gone and that it was all of a sudden. My condolences go to his family and I hope that they are all okay. The email also informed me that another professor, Dr. Williams is taking the class over on such short notice. I have yet to hear anything about this teacher. but in about 15 minutes I will find out exactly who he is and what not.

Dr. Thompson is in my heart and will always be remembered as a great teacher.

https://www.usu.edu/science/index.cfm?in-memoriam-russell-c-thompson

two forms of ID?

Getting a library card is just as difficult as renewing your license. This morning, Katie and I went over to the county library to get a library card so that we could check out books whenever we want. We thought 'oh it won't take that long and its free so we are good, right?' Wrong! Now it wouldn't have taken that long, if we had two forms of ID one of which has the address at which we live and the other needs to be a picture ID. Not too difficult right? Wrong. It turns out that the only thing that I have that has my address on it that would work is my lease agreement which is somewhere in the bottom of my drawer full of papers.... All this for a free card... :)

So, I guess getting a library card is easier than renewing your license, but still. It's free why do we need a whole bunch of stuff... Oh and guess what. If you are under the age of 5 you are not allowed a library card. At least not in Logan your not. Its interesting.

As we were driving to the library, you could see the inversion moving in over the city. It was kinda cool looking but really disgusting- right next to the beautiful blue sky was this layer of dark grey. :( I have a feeling its going to be a red air quality day once again. Good thing I am staying inside practically all day today. :)

Pot Roast, Birthday and Birthday Wishes!!!

For my birthday my parents bestowed upon me a lovely present; that of a 26" flat screen tv. It is pretty! Well, I just barely got it set up and working (thanks to a quick phone call to Jeremy!) So exciting!! :) Thanks to everyone for an amazing birthday! I know it's a little late but better later than never!

Shout out to my oldest Brother!!!! I love you to death! I want to wish you the best birthday and year to follow!! I hope all your wishes come true! Love you so much and I am so happy/grateful you are my brother! You are a great example of someone who works hard to get what he wants out of life! I look up to more times than not and I know that I can always look to you for advice or help in any way! Love you! And Happy Birthday! :)

So a little subject change here- I threw in my pot roast today! The smell in my apartment is amazing. I am just praying that it turns out.... :) This is my first time cooking a pot roast and so I didn't know really what to do. But, with pointers from my grandma, and finding a recipe in my new recipe book (even though I didn't use it) I was able to make my way through throwing everything in a crock pot and turning on the heat. Ha Ha. :) I will post pictures once it is done so you can see the end result. :)

Well, back to the grind of doing homework. :)

cool story hanzel....

Life has been happening.... what is there to say? Sometimes it is really overwhelming, and other times it seems like nothing could be better! How do you handle the two extremes? Do you just ignore the bad and focus on the good? Ya, tried that one. Didn't turn out so well. The bad just built up into something that was unbearable and I just exploded with emotions. There has to be some happy medium. A happy place where everything is good and nearly worry-free. (I doubt a place actually exists but it's a nice thought.)

So, my life. For the past like month it has seemed like everything that could go wrong, did. All the way from locking myself in my room for really no reason, to finding out I was getting a new roommate and that she might move in on my birthday (not a fan of that idea!) I just got so caught up in everything I forgot to look around. I haven't wanted to deal with anyone else's crap and so I didn't, which was completely out of character for me. Usually, when I get down in life, I start caring more about other people and trying to fix their problems. It's a way for me to help someone even if it is not the person who needs it the most.... me.

I just had enough. I found out I was losing my Grant for school, and that I might not get Federal Aid. Which means that I may not have enough money to live here next year. I found out, like I mentioned before, that I was getting a new roommate and that she is crazy and more of an emotional wreck than me... It was also a realization that I may be doing something that I may not want to be doing and that that is what might be confusing me.... I came to another realization that I am not a fan of weddings (sad day huh?) but ya the whole idea of a huge ordeal all focused on you, all the planning, stress, and drama- not pleasing. Don't get me wrong, I love it when my friends/family get married, I really do! And I do want to get married someday. I am just not a fan of the idea of everything that it involves... at least not right now in this time of my life.

Let's see what else. Oh, I figured out that I am avoider, I avoid the major issues in my life. And generally feel guilty for things I should be doing in life when there is really no point to feel guilty at all. I came to the realization that my closest friends and I hardly ever talk, and that is just because of how my personality is with other people, it has nothing to do with my friends at all! Take Katie and I for example, we don't ever talk at least not in person. If we do talk its either on Facebook, or through text while we are in the next room... Or we will both be preoccupied with something else and casually talk about stuff that is going on. Never really serious and never while being in the same room.

Now, see all of these things (and there are many, many more) people have told me about them. All my life people have told me about what I act like, and that these things are true. I just have never listened I guess. Or maybe it was that I was listening, I just thought that they were crazy and that they didn't know me. I wanted to be different from what they thought of me. Well, turns out you guys knew me pretty well. And all this realization came to me all at once. What a shocker that was. And boy, I did not handle it well at all! Still, even now I have problems cause I don't know what in the world I am doing. During the day I put on a smile and just go through the same old procedure I do all the time. But as soon as I get out of that rut I have created for myself, oh man do I get confused.

It is bit better now. I had a much needed weekend. Since my 21st birthday was on Wednesday, I decided to go down last weekend to St. George to visit my family! It had been two whole months!!! That may not seem like a long time, but really it was a long two months of straight winter with no sun! That puts a huge damper on your spirits! So last weekend, even though it was crazy busy, extremely loud, and got very little sleep (thanks to my adorable little niece Allie Rose), I got to see the sun! :) I got to feel the warmth as the rays penetrated my skin! It was so worth the 6 hour drive! And what made the trip even better was that I got to see my mom and dad, and sleep in my own bed, and play with my niece and nephew, and just be home! That right there is the biggest uplifter! :)

So, I just read through this and its kinda a downer, but my life is getting better promise, its just stressful and if you know anything about me, you would know that I don't handle stress well at all!

So That is my story and I am stickin to it... (and in words of Katie as a response- 'cool story hanzel')